Advise to self. · Atim says · just mercy · Lessons · the word

Share your thoughts with me!

Time check: 4:39am. I don’t have sleep, and clearly it doesn’t intend on coming any time soon. I had two options. Either keep lying on my bed while I think and worry about all I need to read for the forthcoming bar course examinations (which, sadly, I was doing in large quantities) or to grab my headsets listen to some really good music (Travis Greene’s  “You Made a Way” for some reason has been my jam for the past two days) as I write about something that has been on my mind since Monday.

VANITY!.

On Monday I decided that I will be embarking on a study about Vanity and how it affects our spiritual lives and just us as people generally. This I decided after I read something someone had written about needing to stop taking pictures as much as she does because it is all vanity and she wouldn’t that affecting her. This wasn’t all that inspired my decision, a number of other things that have happened in my life this year got me thinking about vanity and trying to really understand it in a Christian perspective. What I read was just the last stroke on the Carmel’s back. Before this year, I never really had much thought to this topic because I guess I just didn’t find it necessary then. Now, I really need to understand this. 
First, let’s define vanity. My dictionary defines vanity as:


1. That which is vain, futile, or worthless; that which is of no use or value.

2. Excessive pride in, or admiration of one’s own abilities, appearance or achievements.

So here’s my question:

At what point exactly is the indulgence in the vanities of life said to be a menace to someone’s life?

Someone called me vain because I take too many pictures. The reasons he had for saying that were far from the reasons why I take pictures!. Actually I think this story needs to be told. It’s really brief! Let’s have a brief side bar. Shall we?

                        ********

 Here’s what happened. 

So, person X (who barely knows me) gets into my gallery sometime in February and was wondering why I had a certain number of pictures, most of which were pictures of me or my friends and I. Well, I laughed, and just told him that they didn’t seem too many to me. So he goes on and on about how they are really many considering most of them had something to do with me. So I told him they were initially about ten times more than that from last year but as is my habit, at the beginning of the year I transfer pictures from the previous year into my laptop and delete them from my phone. So, really, the number of pictures I’d accumulated from January to February didn’t seem many to me. He looked at me in bewilderment and told me I am a vain person and I needed to change. Lol. What does being vain mean? It has many meanings from being overly proud of oneself especially ones appearance or achievements, to being showy and ostentatious, etc. So I asked person X (who barely knows me, remember?) why he thought so, he said that because I took an outrageous number of pictures, it meant I was so obsessed with my appearance and I was being showy about it and attracting attention to myself!. So I explained to him that I really take pictures just because I’m one of those people who likes to take pictures and will jump at the slightest opportunity to, just because it is truly a happy place for me and not because I want to be showy about it. I asked him whether the fact that I have an outrageous number of pictures stored in my laptop since 2013, but I have barely 250 pictures posted on the only social media site I consistently post my pictures on (Instagram) doesn’t prove to him that clearly this picture taking thing I do isn’t for him, or anybody else and it’s definitely not because I want to be showy about myself and attract attention but just because I am a person who finds pleasure in taking pictures and having memories. And besides people who know me really well always complain about me having so many beautiful pictures, but I never really post any of them anywhere. And I usually give them the same response; I’m taking the picture so that I can have a memory. If I post it, yyaayy! Good for me!. If I don’t, I’m still okay because posting on social media wasn’t the main intention behind taking the picture. Person X stood his ground despite what I’d told him, so I gave up, moved on swiftly and I’d even forgotten about it until Monday. 

Anyway, with the pictures thing, I grew up in a home where my parents took pictures of EVERYTHING. Right from the day we were born, to our first birthdays, to our first visits to the village, to those wide smiled pictures when we lost our first tooth, to when we went to school for the first time, etc. My parents value pictures and they always capture memorable moments to date. And it’s really sweet looking at those pictures. And how thankful I am that I can still have those memories over 20 years later. I’d like to be 40 and grab an album to show my kids how I looked at 20. Wouldn’t that be awesome!

Anyway, that was a side bar. Back to the post.

                        *************

So like I said, that thing that I read about this person not wanting to be affected by her pictures caught my attention and that’s when I said to myself “okay. This is it! I think it’s just me who clearly is still ignorant with regards to this vanity topic!” I decided that my Bible, my God and I need to have some deep dates and discuss this topic over a period of time. 

I’d also like to ask what you think about vanity and when exactly do you think it becomes a menace?

So, lets share in the comments section. If you have too much to say on the topic and feel like you wouldn’t say all of it in a comment, feel free to write a blog post on it and I’ll check it out. Also, if you’ve already written on this topic, you can leave a link to it which I will read. Thank you. 
Otherwise I hope you are okay and have a great day!

Atim❤

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11 thoughts on “Share your thoughts with me!

    1. Yyaaayyyy!… Can’t wait to here what you think!. As for the writing rampage, lol. I’m unemployed and basically just chill around my patient waiting to help her. What does that mean? I have fffrrreeee time! So I’m just trying to get the most out of it by doing stuff I usually say “I don’t have time to do” before it goes away..
      Thanks for reading and commenting!.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. It is hard for my brain to organise my thoughts when ur on it as well…they will take forever to get written, how abt I just take your side….PS: It was unfit that person X judged you by their standards!
    Lovely piece though.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I have nothing to add to what uv said abt vanity buh I gat ALOT to say about person x.
    For starters how is it his business that u take alot of pictures, ur pictures fr that matter .. Not pictures of him, or his friends, or the strangers on the street but your friends n u?
    Then why are people so fast to give their Opinions even when no one has asked them to?
    Thirdly, what makes person x believe that everyone must do as he says, that his opinion and his way of looking at life works and should be the same for everyone else?
    Why are people so… (trying to look for a right word to use)… U know what, ill jus go with unhappy. Some people are silently so unhappy with themselves that they believe that makin others feel small and bad about themselves will overturn their unhappy selves into happy selves. (hope u get what AM trying to say here.)
    Probably lastly, person x, whoever he is.. Should take a seat and be humble. Everyone has a reason for doing everything they do, people should stop thinking that jus because they believe something is wrong and “vain” , that other people should automatically resign from doing it.. What if its their passion, or God’s call. Or the only thing that brings them happiness, should they leave jus because so and so said its bad and calls for too much attention?
    I just don’t understand some people riyale. Sorry for the rant.
    Ill Sign off by saying people should endevour to mind their own business at all times and atleast take an effort to understand or even accept the other person ‘s reasons for choosin to do what they are doing.

    Like

  3. Oh I forgot to say, since when is self love a bad thing huh?…
    These are the very people who come to peoples rooms and home and conplain about the decor, or the way the kitchen is organised or even go as far as givin their Opinions on how they dont like the kind of flowers in your compound…. ( where do they find emojis on this app cz I surely need some help with e faces)
    Ironically I think these r the people who r vain.. One of the characteristic of a vain person is they often think that their Opinions matter so much and People should all do as they think.. In short, they believe the sun revolves around them….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hihihihi… You know what… This comment has inspired a blog post I’m posting in a few minutes. You should check it out. Let’s go continue the discussion in that post… Otherwise, thanks for reading and commenting!.

      Like

  4. Liz’s last comment, the one where she asks a very important question of “When did selflove become bad?” That got me. That’s what I was thinking the whole time I read the blog post. Whats wrong with people thinking they are actually LIT? If I dont love myself in this society that profits off of people hating everything about themselves, who will love me? Does person X realise that self love is an actual act of defiance in this world that is teaching us to hate ourselves? I think it’s important that we don’t conflate it with vanity. Do we need to discuss people getting nose jobs, and armpit jobs and lip jobs, name it? The truth is, even these people, our society shames them. WE SHAME THEM! NOW, ARE WE GOING TO SHAMELESSLY MAKE PEOPLE WHO LOVE THEMSELVES FEEL BAD ABOUT THAT TOO? Are we going to start shaming people because of the number of selfies they take in their own phones? Like, Sir, you don’t know my story, you don’t know my struggles, you have no business telling me what vanity is and what it is not. Atim, I realize that you are a little bit on the defensive, trying to explain how you take pictures just for the memories; and while I think it’s important that you makes your intentions clear, I don’t think you needs to explain yourself to anyone. I’ve been hesitant to comment because I was scared of coming off as an angry woman, but after a conversation I had with my friend, here I am, Jesus help me, lol.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hey Nalwanga… Thank you so much for reading and commenting!. I was laughing as I read this comment, wishing you were the person person X had been speaking to. Hahahaha. I can only imagine what he would have received that day. Hahaha. Anyway, your comment and those of Liz inspired a new blog post I’m posting in a few minutes. If you can check it out. I’ll be glad.

      Liked by 1 person

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